The (Not So) Secret To Getting Things You Want From Others

                                           Photo by  @scoutthecity  on  Unsplash  

                                          Photo by @scoutthecity on Unsplash 

We live in a world where we depend on others to get what we want out of life. Not everyone has the same thing to offer and collaboration is key to achieving more.

But getting someone to commit to saying “yes” to you is not always an easy endeavour.

  • How many times have you been rejected?
  • How many times have you feared getting rejected?
  • When has your fear of the dreadful “no” word prevented you from even trying in the first place?

At least a few times right?

We get a “no” more frequently than we get a “yes”. After a point, it’s hard to handle another “no”.

So here’s my “secret” to you:

Never stop asking.

I’ve been surprised how many times I asked for things and actually received a “yes”, against all odds.

I’ve received competitive grants, made partners and incredible collaborators in my businesses, and established important business relations.

Just yesterday, I got two important “yes” for Viking Boutique: a blacksmith, and leather workers. Having unique items in the store will be a key differentiator. I almost didn’t ask for fear of rejection. I’m glad I didn’t!

Learn From Rejection

Getting a “yes” is a combination of hard work, perseverance, awareness, circumstance, and luck. Probably a whole bunch of other things too.

The worst thing you can do when getting a “no” is to assume it’s their fault. There are hundreds of variables at any point in time.

Try to figure the variables out.

  • Was it just bad timing?
  • Was it how you presented yourself?
  • How was your language? Your body language?
  • Were they giving signs it wouldn’t work, but you weren’t aware enough?
  • Did you have the right contact?

It could just be bad luck, but I’d leave that excuse as a last resort.

Never blindly ask the same person/business multiple times without at least trying to understand why you got rejected in the first place. Learn from your rejections.

Conclusion

Don’t let your fear of rejection prevent you from asking. Do your best and dare ask for what you need.

Learn from your rejections. With practice, you’ll see that your “yes” streak will start to increase.

You can do this!

First published here: https://medium.com/@danny_forest/the-not-so-secret-to-getting-things-you-want-from-others-dc579995efb1